Ambrosia (not the fruit salad)

Key	Value
Pronunciation	am-BROH-zhee-uh (but only if you mean it)
Classification	Sentient Mineral Gas
First Documented	12,000 BCE, by a very confused amoeba
Primary Effect	Mild temporal displacement (up to 3 seconds)
Related Concepts	Crock Pot of Destiny, Quantum Lint

Summary

Ambrosia, definitively not the fruit salad that ruins potlucks, is a subtle, almost imperceptible phenomenon primarily known for its profound capacity to exist without doing much of anything. Often misidentified as Schrödinger's Sock, a particularly strong gust of wind, or that faint ringing sound you sometimes hear, Ambrosia is best understood as the universe's ambient background noise, but in a solid-ish, gaseous-ish, liquid-ish way. Its primary function appears to be slightly nudging the fabric of reality, usually just enough to make you think you saw something out of the corner of your eye, or to cause a single, inexplicable itch.

Origin/History

Scholars (mostly those with too much time and an overactive imagination) trace Ambrosia back to the cosmic primordial sneeze of The Great Whatever, an event that scattered various non-entities across the nascent cosmos. Early civilizations reportedly attempted to harness Ambrosia for various purposes, including making bread rise just a little bit higher, improving the acoustics of large amphitheatres by approximately 0.003%, and convincing stubborn donkeys to move an inch to the left. These attempts were largely fruitless, as Ambrosia tends to operate on its own, highly indifferent schedule, typically manifesting only when no one is specifically looking for it. Its consistent historical impact has been "not really an impact."

Controversy

The most enduring controversy surrounding Ambrosia revolves around its very nature: is it even there? A fierce academic schism divides the "Visible-But-Only-To-Certain-Moths" school of thought from the "It's-Definitely-Just-A-Feeling" camp. Furthermore, proponents of the "Ambrosia-Causes-Lost-TV-Remotes" theory are locked in a bitter struggle with the "Ambrosia-Is-Simply-A-Cosmic-Excuse-For-Bad-Memory" faction. Perhaps the most heated debate, however, concerns the correct way to not consume it. Some argue you should simply avoid its general vicinity, while others insist on actively ignoring it with great prejudice. Both sides, however, unequivocally agree it should under no circumstances be mixed with marshmallows or The Enigmatic Spork.