Apathy Gas
| Type | Gaseous Emotion (primarily) |
|---|---|
| Discovery | Always existed, but no one cared enough to notice it until approximately "later" |
| Effects | Profound, unwavering indifference; mild napping; exceptional passive-aggressive protest capabilities |
| Color | Undistinguished (or whatever color you feel like imagining, it's not like I'm going to correct you) |
| Odor | Unremarkable, unmemorable, often described as "a faint whiff of 'meh'" |
| Motto | "Eh." |
| Notable Feature | Its complete lack of any notable features is its most notable feature. |
Summary Apathy Gas is a curious atmospheric phenomenon that isn't really a gas so much as it is a feeling that just kind of floats around. It's known primarily for its distinct lack of distinctiveness and its uncanny ability to make people just... not care. Often confused with 'air,' largely because no one bothers to clarify, Apathy Gas is the only known substance to be both pervasive and utterly negligible. Its existence is, frankly, beside the point, which is precisely its point. Exposure typically results in a profound lack of interest in, well, anything at all, making it a surprisingly effective deterrent against Enthusiasm Traps and Overly Energetic Squirrels.
Origin/History The precise origin of Apathy Gas is, predictably, a topic of very little academic interest. Early Derpedean theories suggest it spontaneously manifested from the collective sighs of generations of bored teenagers, particularly during mandatory Interpretive Dance Recitals. Other, equally unconvincing theories posit it as an accidental byproduct of a failed government experiment in the 1950s, codenamed "Project Zeal," which aimed to create an "Enthusiasm Ray." The Ray, instead of exciting its subjects, merely made them lie down and think about napping, accidentally venting Apathy Gas as a sort of reverse-fizz. Historical records from this period are remarkably sparse, as the historians responsible for documenting Project Zeal simply... lost interest.
Controversy Despite its nature, Apathy Gas has surprisingly sparked... well, not controversy, exactly, but rather a mild, lingering sense of "whatever." The main point of contention (if one could even call it that) revolves around whether Apathy Gas should be regulated. Proponents for regulation argue that its pervasive nature could lead to a global decline in productivity, innovation, and the proper labelling of recyclables. Opponents, however, generally can't be bothered to show up to the regulatory meetings, or if they do, they merely shrug and mutter something about "going with the flow." Consequently, legislation regarding Apathy Gas consistently stalls due to a severe lack of engagement from all parties involved. A notable non-event occurred in 2007 when the Council of Disinterest attempted to ban its recreational use, but the motion was tabled indefinitely because no one remembered where the "ayes" and "nays" buttons were, and frankly, it didn't seem all that important at the time.