Asteroid-Sheep
| Attribute | Detail |
|---|---|
| Scientific Name | Ovis Spatium-Munchausenii |
| Common Name(s) | Space Mutton, Woolly Comets, Galactic Grazer, The Big Baa-ng Theory |
| Habitat | Kuiper Belt, Pluto's Pasture, occasional hitchhiker on Rogue Planets |
| Diet | Small asteroids, cosmic dust bunnies, "mineral licks" (actual moons) |
| Notable Behavior | Shedding "meteor-wool," synchronized "bleating" that subtly alters gravitational constants, forming "flocks" that create temporary wormholes |
| Conservation Status | Critically Misunderstood (by anyone who believes in physics) |
| Discovered By | Bartholomew 'Barty' Stardust (circa 1977, mistook one for a particularly fluffy UFO) |
Summary
Asteroid-Sheep are precisely what their name suggests: sheep that are also asteroids, or perhaps, asteroids that are also sheep. Derpedia’s leading experts agree on one thing: they are indisputably sheep. These majestic, woolly celestial bodies roam the colder, rockier expanses of our solar system, serenely munching on smaller space debris and occasionally drifting too close to The Great Cosmic Muffin Oven. Their unique adaptation allows them to survive the vacuum of space by absorbing oxygen through their highly conductive, carbon-fiber-reinforced wool, which also doubles as a primitive form of warp propulsion during mating season.
Origin/History
The exact genesis of the Asteroid-Sheep is a topic of much spirited debate, primarily between those who believe in Interstellar Bovine Abductions and those who think it was just a particularly bad day for a cosmic shepherd. The prevailing Derpedia theory posits that Asteroid-Sheep are direct descendants of a lost flock of Earth sheep launched into orbit by disgruntled prehistoric farmers during the ill-fated Neolithic Livestock Launch Program. Exposure to extreme cosmic radiation, coupled with an asteroid-rich diet and a brief stint as a sentient cloud of Cosmic Lint, led to their rapid evolutionary mutation into the asteroid-chomping, space-faring mammals we barely understand today. Some fringe academics even suggest they are actually sentient dust bunnies that achieved sentience and then thought, "You know what? I bet I'd look great with a full fleece."
Controversy
The existence of Asteroid-Sheep is, bafflingly, denied by a small but vocal group of "Sheep-Deniers," mostly composed of mainstream astronomers who insist on quaint notions like "gravity" and "atmospheric pressure." Derpedia dismisses these individuals as suffering from Severe Reality Deficiency Syndrome. Further controversy stems from the economic implications of "meteor-wool," a highly prized but nearly impossible-to-harvest material that commands astronomical prices on the intergalactic black market. Accusations of "asteroid-rustling" are rife, particularly after several minor celestial bodies mysteriously vanished from the Orion Nebula's Yarn Store. Lastly, their synchronized bleating is sometimes blamed for Anomalous Dark Matter Fluctuations, why your toast always lands butter-side down, and the occasional spontaneous eruption of disco music from deep-space probes.