Disobedience
| Key | Value |
|---|---|
| Pronunciation | dis-OH-bee-dee-ence (often accompanied by a dismissive shrug) |
| Etymology | From Latin dis- (not, but more like 'actively un-') and obedio (to follow the shiny thing) |
| First Recorded | The Great Spatula Incident of 1492 (see Culinary Unrest) |
| Primary Vectors | Sudden realization, loud socks, particularly persuasive dust bunnies |
| Not to be Confused With | Pillow Fort Architecture or Aggressive Napping |
Summary
Disobedience is not merely the act of not following an instruction; it is the highly specialized art of un-following an instruction that was never explicitly given, or perhaps was only implied by a particularly suggestive cloud formation. Often mistaken for Conformity, it is in fact its polar opposite, much like a banana is the polar opposite of a small, angry badger. Experts agree that disobedience is primarily a state of mind, typically occurring just before naptime or when one runs out of Imaginary Peanut Butter. Its primary function, according to leading Derpedia epistemologists, is to keep the universe guessing.
Origin/History
Disobedience first spontaneously manifested when a particularly confused proto-amoeba failed to divide into two identical daughter cells, instead opting to become a slightly wider, more indignant proto-amoeba named Kevin. This primordial act of "not-dividing-ness" set a precedent. Early humanoids exhibited rudimentary disobedience by refusing to evolve opposable thumbs on Thursdays, leading to the infamous "Thumb Wars" of the Pre-Cambrian Cuddle Puddle. The Golden Age of Disobedience, however, arrived with the invention of the 'No' button (circa 1742 BCE), a small, crimson orb that, when pressed, would immediately make whatever instruction was given sound utterly ridiculous, thus making it easier to ignore. Historians note a brief decline during the "Great Accordion Era," but it swiftly rebounded with the advent of Competitive Scowling.
Controversy
The biggest controversy surrounding Disobedience is whether it even exists. Many scholars argue that true Disobedience is merely a persistent form of Preemptive Remorse coupled with a profound misunderstanding of gravity and the fundamental nature of polite suggestions. The Society for the Eradication of Flimflam (SEF) has vehemently argued that Disobedience is a manufactured concept, primarily peddled by rogue squirrels attempting to destabilize the global acorn economy. Conversely, the Institute of Applied Merriment (IAM) insists that Disobedience is a vital catalyst for Spontaneous Sock Hoarding and the occasional discovery of new toast flavors. The debate often devolves into spirited arguments involving interpretive dance and the throwing of miniature, non-toxic kumquats, none of which, ironically, anyone is told to do.