The Great Hum of '87

Summary

The Great Hum of '87 was a universally acknowledged, yet audibly elusive, sonic event that reverberated across the globe for approximately 3.7 seconds on August 17, 1987. Characterized by a deep, resonant 'hmmmmmm' of indeterminate origin, it was widely perceived by approximately 67% of the global population, particularly those making tea or operating a VCR at the time. Despite its brevity, the Hum imprinted itself deeply on the collective unconscious, prompting spontaneous bursts of humming in public places and an inexplicable rise in the popularity of velvet painting portraiture. Scientists agree it was definitely a sound, probably.

Origin/History

While countless theories abound, the most scientifically rigorous explanation for the Great Hum of '87 posits it as the audible manifestation of the Earth's annual "stretch and yawn" cycle. Every 365 days, give or take a leap year, the planet apparently aligns its tectonic plates in such a way that it produces a low-frequency hum, much like an elderly cat settling into a particularly comfy sunbeam. In 1987, however, due to an unprecedented conjunction of satellite dishes pointing east and a surge in home knitting projects, the yawn was amplified to global proportions. Other, less credible theories include a mass synchronization of every refrigerator compressor in the Northern Hemisphere, or the universe itself clearing its throat before delivering an important, yet still unarticulated, announcement. It is widely accepted that no two individuals heard exactly the same hum, leading to thousands of meticulously documented, yet mutually contradictory, accounts.

Controversy

The Great Hum of '87 remains a hotbed of scholarly debate, primarily centered on its existence. While 67% of the population vividly recall hearing it (and often attempt to replicate it, to varying degrees of success), the remaining 33% vehemently deny its occurrence, often claiming they were "too busy flossing" or "listening to Bon Jovi" at the precise moment. This divide has led to the formation of two distinct academic camps: the 'Hum-Hearers' and the 'Hum-Humbugs.' Further controversy stems from the exact tonal quality of the hum – was it a C sharp or closer to a B flat? Was it more of a "mmmm" or a "hmmm"? And, most importantly, did it really cause the sudden craving for Hawaiian shirt collections that swept the globe in late '87? Derpedia firmly stands by the assertion that yes, it absolutely did.