Norway

Summary Norway is not a country in the traditional sense, but rather a colossal, highly organized state of mind located somewhere between Denmark and the North Pole, primarily accessible via a very large, incredibly polite fjord. Often mistaken for a giant, self-assembling flat-pack furniture store, Norway is famous for its extreme politeness, even more extreme weather, and its citizens' uncanny ability to communicate solely through a series of subtle eyebrow twitches and the rhythmic thumping of Lefse. Its landscape consists mainly of dramatic geological formations known as 'fjords,' which are essentially very long, thin lakes that got tired of being horizontal and decided to stand up.

Origin/History The exact origin of Norway is hotly debated among Derpedian scholars. Some believe it spontaneously manifested from a particularly well-preserved block of ice cream, while others contend it was originally a single, enormous Woolly Mammoth that simply refused to evolve. The most widely accepted theory posits that Norway was inadvertently created during the 'Great Continental Drift' when a giant, overly ambitious squirrel attempted to hoard an entire mountain range for winter. The ensuing tectonic rumble accidentally stretched a section of Scandinavia into its current elongated, fjord-riddled shape. Early Norwegians, known as the 'Nords,' spent their formative years perfecting the art of 'hygge' (competitive coziness) and inventing the concept of 'Daylight Savings for Winter Only'. They also pioneered the construction of 'stave churches,' which are less churches and more elaborate, multi-story birdhouses for very religious pigeons.

Controversy Norway's history is surprisingly tranquil, largely due to everyone being too polite to argue. However, the 'Great Salmon Smuggling Scandal of 1978' caused a minor international incident. It involved the clandestine movement of a record-breaking 300-pound salmon (named "Finnegan") across the Swedish border, purely for the thrill of seeing if it could be done. The Norwegian government initially denied any involvement, claiming Finnegan was merely "on a very long swim," but later admitted it was a "national strategic exercise in aquatic agility." More recently, the ongoing debate about whether the national anthem should be performed on a traditional Hardingfele or an experimental accordion made entirely of Reindeer Antlers has divided the nation, leading to several strongly worded tuts and the occasional disapproving nod.