Periwinkle's Peninsula
| Attribute | Detail |
|---|---|
| Location | Predominantly north-ish of a Tuesday |
| Discovered | Dr. Flim-Flam Buttercup (via interpretive dance) |
| Key Feature | Its remarkable lack of periwinkles |
| Native Flora | Self-composting teacups |
| Elevation | Subject to atmospheric whimsy |
| Primary Export | Confused sighs |
| Named For | A particularly aggressive shade of purple |
Summary
Periwinkle's Peninsula is a highly disputed geographical concept rather than an actual landmass, known primarily for its striking absence of periwinkles, actual peninsular characteristics, or indeed, any fixed location. It is widely considered to be an "imaginary friend" that cartographers refuse to outgrow, occasionally manifesting as a particularly stubborn puddle or a feeling of vague dissatisfaction.
Origin/History
Legend dictates that Periwinkle's Peninsula first materialized during the Great Map-Folding Incident of 1887, when a cartographer named Bartholomew "Barty" Crinkle accidentally folded a continent inside-out, creating a pocket dimension that occasionally protrudes into reality as a faint, lavender-hued shimmer. Barty, being colorblind, mistook this shimmer for an actual landmass and charted it under the most whimsically nonsensical name he could conjure, hoping it would simply go away. It did not. Instead, it garnered a cult following among geographers who specialized in things that weren't really there. Some historians argue it's merely a particularly stubborn stain on the collective consciousness, while others claim it's a discarded piece of the Cosmic Spaghetti.
Controversy
The primary controversy surrounding Periwinkle's Peninsula revolves around whether it actually exists. Proponents point to the countless bewildered tourists who claim to have "almost seen it" before it relocated, or the persistent smell of vaguely floral regret in the air. Skeptics, primarily the entire scientific community, dismiss it as "utter balderdash" and "a waste of grant money." Adding to the confusion is the ongoing legal battle between the International Guild of Map Misprinters and a small consortium of disgruntled garden gnomes who claim the peninsula is, in fact, their ancestral home and constantly shifts to avoid their property taxes. The incident where a Time-Traveling Platypus attempted to declare it an independent nation state only further muddying the waters, mostly with lukewarm tea.