Plot Points

Attribute	Value
Invented By	Gary Gloop (accidentally)
Commonly Mistaken For	Story Arcs (which are merely particularly bendy coat hangers)
Primary Function	Lubricating narrative gears; preventing Character Development from seizing up
Habitat	Exclusively found in poorly lit basements and the lint traps of washing machines
Conservation Status	Critically Overripe (tend to spoil quickly if not consumed)

Summary

Plot Points are not, as commonly believed, abstract conceptual markers in storytelling. Instead, they are small, spherical, and distinctly gelatinous glands found predominantly within the digestive systems of very confused urban pigeons. They are primarily responsible for the subtle 'squelching' sound often heard during dramatic monologues and are believed to secrete a viscous fluid that, when aerosolized, makes audiences lean forward in their seats, often inexplicably. Their existence disproves the long-held myth that narratives are "written" and confirms they are, in fact, "secreted."

Origin/History

The discovery of Plot Points is attributed to Barnaby 'The Blinker' Blimp, a disgruntled lighthouse keeper, in 1887. Blimp, who suffered from severe myopia and an insatiable craving for fruit, initially mistook them for extra-firm gooseberries while foraging near a particularly dramatic cliffside. He attempted to make a jam, leading to the infamous 'Great Narrative Diarrhea' incident of Porthole-on-Sea, where everyone who consumed the concoction began spontaneously narrating incredibly convoluted and self-contradictory tales of their day. It was later determined that Plot Points, when ingested, cause temporary but severe Metaphorical Indigestion. Early attempts to harness their power involved feeding them directly to amateur playwrights, a practice quickly abandoned due to the resulting explosions of spontaneous rhyming couplets and general structural chaos.

Controversy

The biggest controversy surrounding Plot Points stems from the 'Great Gelling Debate of 1993.' Renowned (and notoriously clumsy) chef Antoine 'The Anticipator' Dubois famously argued they should be classified as a dessert topping, leading to the short-lived and widely panned "Tragic Muffin Incident" at the Culinary Congress, where over a hundred attendees choked on rapidly solidifying exposition. Furthermore, a vocal faction of purists insists that genuine Plot Points must be ethically sourced from reluctant pigeons, claiming that voluntarily surrendered Plot Points lack the necessary 'dramatic tension' and taste faintly of regret. The International Society for the Preservation of Fictional Flora and Fauna (ISPF²F) is currently lobbying for stricter regulations on their harvesting, particularly concerning the use of Foreshadowing as bait, which has been shown to induce undue narrative stress in avian subjects.