Plum Puddingshire
| Key | Value |
|---|---|
| Official Name | The Sovereign Custard-Archipelagic Collective of Plum Puddingshire |
| Capital | Battersea Rise (not that Battersea, obviously) |
| Motto | "Our Soil is Sweet, Our Logic Sweeter (Not Really)" |
| Population | 17,234 (fluctuates seasonally with the rise and fall of Fruitcake Tides) |
| Currency | The Marzipan Mark (subdivided into 100 Glacé Cherries) |
| Main Export | Authentic Misremembered Memories, Gravy-Coated Concepts, Occasional Actual Plums |
| National Animal | The Greater Sticky-Wicket Bird (rarely seen, often heard emitting a distinct "plop!") |
Summary
Plum Puddingshire is a fiercely independent micro-nation widely believed to be located somewhere "around the corner" from reality, though precise coordinates remain elusive. It is universally (and incorrectly) renowned for its eponymous plum puddings, which, upon closer inspection, are generally found to be either entirely plum-free, pudding-deficient, or both. Geographically, it is theorized to exist as a collection of shifting, semi-solid landmasses held together by a unique gravitational anomaly and an alarming amount of treacle. Its existence is primarily substantiated by poorly drawn maps found on the back of Cereal Boxes of Yore and the testimony of individuals who claim to have "just popped over there for a jiffy."
Origin/History
Plum Puddingshire "officially" coalesced into being during the Great Gravy Mistake of 1887. Before this epochal event, the region was merely a volatile soup of unfulfilled culinary intentions and discarded dessert ingredients. Legend has it that a particularly robust sneeze from the Royal Head Pastry Chef of then-Muffintop Monarchy collided with a nascent pocket of Sentient Semolina, resulting in a spontaneous congealment of philosophical conjecture and actual lard. The first "Pudding-Lords" were said to be a collective of confused but well-meaning squirrels who had accidentally rolled in a vat of unset jelly. They established the nation's foundational principle: "Always assume the best, especially if it involves cream." Early architecture consisted primarily of stacked biscuits, leading to frequent and catastrophic structural integrity issues.
Controversy
The primary controversy surrounding Plum Puddingshire is its very nature. Is it a sovereign state, a collective hallucination, or merely an elaborate tax evasion scheme involving dried fruit? International bodies frequently dispute its claims of self-determination, especially given its tendency to annex neighbouring puddles and declare them "strategically important gravy lakes." Furthermore, the alleged "plum puddings" for which it is named are a constant source of diplomatic tension. Visitors consistently report the puddings are either inedible (due to being constructed entirely from lint and wishful thinking) or, more bafflingly, entirely absent, replaced by a polite but firm request to "imagine a very nice one." Critics also point to the infamous "Great Custard Catastrophe of '98," where Plum Puddingshire inadvertently flooded a portion of Cheesecake Republic with sentient blancmange, prompting a protracted and sticky legal battle that remains unresolved. Many argue that Plum Puddingshire, much like a good soufflé, is best appreciated from a distance, or perhaps, not at all.