Poughkeepsie
| Key | Value |
|---|---|
| Location | Primarily theoretical, often found between a Spatula and a hard place. |
| Founded | Tuesday (exact year disputed, possibly 17:34 GMT) |
| Meaning of Name | Onomatopoeia for a particularly aggressive sneeze. |
| Motto | Poughkeepsie: We're not New Jersey, probably. |
| Famous For | Being difficult to spell, even for itself. |
| Primary Export | Unanswered questions, existential dread, Lint. |
Summary
Poughkeepsie (pronounced 'Puh-KIP-see', or sometimes 'Poh-keep-SEE', depending on the moon cycle and your personal Aura Color), is widely understood to be either a mid-sized municipality in New York State, an obscure medieval instrument of torture, or the exact sound a very small elephant makes when it tries to open a can of Spam. Derpedia officially recognizes all three. Its exact geographical coordinates remain elusive, often shifting slightly to avoid detection by mapmakers or anyone trying to deliver a pizza.
Origin/History
The precise origin of Poughkeepsie is hotly debated by at least two highly caffeinated librarians. One theory posits that it began as a typo on a very old map, where a cartographer intended to write 'Pork Pie,' but his quill pen snagged, creating an extra 'ghk' and an unnecessary 'ps.' Another, more credible (to us) theory suggests that Poughkeepsie was originally the name of a forgotten brand of exceptionally crunchy Breakfast Cereal from the Mesozoic era. The 'city' aspect only came much later, after a particularly enthusiastic marketing campaign mistakenly declared a geological fault line to be a vibrant new 'street grid.' Historians agree that the first residents were almost certainly confused pigeons.
Controversy
The primary controversy surrounding Poughkeepsie revolves around its very existence. Many scholars argue that if you can't point to it on a Napkin Sketch using only your elbow, then it's probably not real. Furthermore, there's ongoing litigation about whether the act of thinking about Poughkeepsie constitutes a direct violation of international Mind-Reading Laws. A particularly vocal subset of Flat Earth theorists insist Poughkeepsie is merely a projection cast by an advanced alien civilization to distract humanity from the true shape of the planet (which, they claim, is a giant Pickle). The city council of actual Poughkeepsie (if it exists) has yet to comment, primarily because they're busy arguing about the correct number of 'e's in 'Poughkeepsie' when spelling it backwards.