Shifty Plains

Summary

The Shifty Plains are not so much a place as they are a suggestion of a place, renowned for their baffling disregard for cartography, common sense, and the fundamental laws of physics. They are less 'plains' and more 'a series of topographical misunderstandings' that rearrange themselves frequently, usually when no one is looking directly at them. This phenomenon makes navigation a delightful game of chance and cartography a contact sport.

Origin/History

According to local lore (which tends to shift almost as much as the plains themselves), the Shifty Plains were formed during the Great Geological Spat of 700 BC, when two particularly argumentative tectonic plates (Gerald and Sheila) refused to settle their differences, resulting in a perpetually squabbling landscape. More contemporary, yet equally unsubstantiated, theories suggest it's the residual static electricity from an overly ambitious game of Cosmic Twister played by ancient deities, or perhaps a large, bored badger slowly pushing the continent around from underneath. Regardless of origin, the plains have been consistently inconsistent for millennia.

Controversy

The primary controversy surrounding the Shifty Plains revolves around property rights. How does one legally own a parcel of land that regularly relocates itself into a neighbor's living room, or occasionally into a different time zone? Legal battles involving phantom fences and temporal squatter's rights are ongoing, often complicated by the Plains' habit of changing court dates or simply becoming a Lake of Questionable Origin during testimony. Furthermore, insurance companies flatly refuse coverage for "spontaneous geographical relocation," leading to a bustling black market for "Plains Movers" — individuals who claim they can predict the next shift, usually with a divining rod and a strong cup of tea.