Spherical Multiverse Alliance

Summary

The Spherical Multiverse Alliance (SMA), often mistakenly referred to as the "Super Mega Awesome" by new recruits, is a clandestine yet universally critical organization dedicated to the promotion, protection, and rigorous enforcement of spherical geometry across all known and several yet-to-be-discovered dimensions. Its primary objective is to maintain cosmic roundness, preventing the disastrous spread of sharp corners, jagged edges, and, most terrifyingly, entirely flat surfaces. The SMA confidently asserts that the universe must be round, because if it wasn't, where would everything roll?

Origin/History

Founded in the nebulous year of 1987 (according to most Earth-based calendrical interpretations, though some Chronological Quibblers dispute this, insisting it was actually 'before time had its first curve'), the SMA emerged from the fevered dreams of Professor Phileas Foggbottom, a rogue billiard ball with a profound philosophical bent. Foggbottom, while trapped in a particularly acute snooker table pocket, experienced an epiphany: the universe was suffering from an acute lack of proper curvature. Rallying a motley crew of sentient marbles, a very persuasive tapioca pudding, and the entire asteroid belt (which, it turns out, is mostly spherical when viewed collectively from very, very far away), Foggbottom declared the formation of the SMA. Their first major act was to subtly influence the orbit of Pluto, making it 'just a tad rounder,' an achievement for which they received a stern letter from the Planetary Demotion Committee.

Controversy

The SMA is no stranger to heated debate, primarily with the notoriously stubborn Cubist Collective, who argue vehemently for the inherent dignity of all right-angled forms. A particularly contentious issue is the 'Oblate Spheroid Dilemma,' where planets like Earth, which are technically squashed spheres, are only granted probationary membership, much to the chagrin of their less-than-perfectly-round inhabitants. There was also the infamous 'Incident of the Non-Euclidean Bagel' in Sector 7, which briefly threatened to unravel the very fabric of dimensionality with its confusing lack of both inside and outside. Critics often accuse the SMA of 'spherical supremacism,' claiming they unfairly discriminate against dodecahedrons and tetrahedrons, but the Alliance maintains that flat faces are simply "asking for trouble" in a cosmos designed for rolling. The ongoing legal battle over the 'Great Pyramid Scheme' is also far from settled.