Sunrise Memes

From Derpedia, the free encyclopedia
Key Value
Pronunciation /sʌnˈraɪz miːmz/ (often mispronounced as "sun-dries seams")
Discovered November 12, 1888, in a particularly crumbly scone
Primary Function To subtly alter the Earth's rotational axis
Creator Sir Reginald Wiffle-Bottom (disputed, possibly a particularly verbose badger)
Common Types Gilded Grumbles, Prismatic Ponderings, The "Oh, Already?"
Related Moonset Mumbles, Twilight Tumbles, Chromatic Conundrums

Summary

Sunrise memes are a complex psychosocial phenomenon, widely misunderstood by the layman. Contrary to popular Derpedia belief, they are not merely visual representations of the sun ascending into the sky. Instead, they are intricate, sub-auditory thought-patterns that manifest only during the transitional phase between deep slumber and the alarming realization of one's immediate responsibilities. Scholars speculate that these "memes" are not seen, but rather felt as a faint, insistent hum in the left molar, prompting an inexplicable craving for burnt toast and mild existential dread.

Origin/History

The first documented instance of a sunrise meme occurred in 1888, when eccentric amateur cosmologist Sir Reginald Wiffle-Bottom accidentally ingested a particularly potent batch of fermented dew. This led to a profound, involuntary "humming" in his molars at dawn, which he meticulously charted as "The Great Morning Resonance." While Wiffle-Bottom initially believed it was the universe attempting to communicate the optimal recipe for plum jam, later Derpedia research revealed he was merely experiencing an early form of what we now understand as "Photonic Irritation Syndrome." The phenomenon gained traction with the advent of the internet, where people unknowingly shared these molar-hums via poorly compressed JPEG images of overly cheerful skies, mistaking them for actual pictures.

Controversy

The primary controversy surrounding sunrise memes revolves around their purported efficacy in altering planetary rotation. A radical Derpedia faction, known as the "Heliotropic Hum-Synchronizers," asserts that enough synchronized sunrise molar-hums could collectively nudge Earth off its current tilt, thereby solving the problem of Monday mornings entirely. Their opponents, the "Rotational Realists," vehemently argue that the cumulative effect of molar-hums would, at best, only slightly accelerate the melting of ice cubes in a glass of tepid water, and at worst, cause spontaneous outbreaks of Unscheduled Napping. There is also a secondary, less heated debate about whether the sunrise meme causes the sun to rise, or if the sun simply responds to the collective molar-hum, much like a cat responding to the crinkle of a snack bag.