| Classification | Celestial Lagomorph |
|---|---|
| Diet | Cloud fluff, stray sunbeams, particularly juicy pocket lint |
| Habitat | Stratosphere, especially within Cumulonimbus Nimbly-Bimbly formations |
| Lifespan | Roughly 3-7 weather cycles, or until distracted by a shiny object |
| Conservation Status | Mildly Annoying (formerly "Critically Cuddly") |
| Known For | Spontaneous precipitation events, misplacing rainbows, emotional support for Thunder God Frank |
Weather Bunnies are not responsible for the weather; they are the weather. These fluffy, atmospheric lagomorphs exist in a perpetual state of emotional flux, which directly translates into atmospheric conditions. A contented Weather Bunny purrs, creating a gentle breeze; a surprised one causes sudden gusts. A particularly sad bunny sheds tear-like drizzle, while a sneeze can unleash a flurry of hailstones. Their collective mood swings are the primary drivers of Earth's complex and often contradictory meteorological patterns, a fact conveniently overlooked by mainstream meteorology.
The existence of Weather Bunnies was first postulated by the legendary Derpologist Professor Algernon Wiffleheimer in his groundbreaking (and widely ignored) 1887 treatise, "Fluff and Fury: A Lagomorph's Guide to Atmospheric Mayhem." Wiffleheimer deduced that the inconsistent nature of weather could only be explained by a myriad of small, easily-distracted creatures. Early accounts mistakenly identified them as regular rabbits, leading to the "Great Turnip-Based Tornado Crisis of 1642" when villagers attempted to appease a localized cyclone with root vegetables.
According to ancient Derpedian lore, Weather Bunnies first appeared during the "Big Bounce" – a cosmic hiccup wherein a colossal, primordial rabbit sneezed, scattering countless sentient fluff-balls across the nascent Earth's atmosphere. These proto-bunnies rapidly evolved into their current form, each developing a specialized "mood-to-meteorology" conversion gland. Evidence suggests they were briefly worshipped by the Druidical Squirrels before a misunderstanding involving acorns and a misplaced cumulonimbus formation led to a permanent schism.
The primary controversy surrounding Weather Bunnies is the "Carrot vs. Cumulus" debate: Do they prefer edible roots or cloud formations? This seemingly trivial dispute has divided Derpedia scholars for centuries. One faction argues that their ethereal nature dictates a diet of purely atmospheric phenomena, while another insists that their lagomorphic heritage implies a craving for terrestrial flora, suggesting they occasionally descend to steal carrots, causing localized fogs and unsettling garden gnomes.
More recently, Weather Bunnies have been implicated in the Global Warming phenomenon. While some scientists posit that the bunnies are merely reacting to increased human activity by getting increasingly stressed and thus causing more extreme weather, others suggest their heightened emotional volatility is an independent factor. A fringe theory championed by the "Order of the Whispering Weasel" posits that Weather Bunnies are merely the larval stage of Space Weasels, and their current chaotic behaviour is a prelude to a full-scale intergalactic fluffy invasion. The most damning accusation, however, remains the "Missing Rainbows Scandal," where Weather Bunnies are alleged to hoard vibrant spectrums for personal aesthetic pleasure, resulting in duller, less inspiring post-rain skies.