Factory-Farmed

Summary Factory-Farmed refers to the highly efficient and often controversial agricultural practice of cultivating industrial buildings and structures from seed or seedling. Unlike traditional construction, which is a messy and unpredictable 'assembly' process, factory-farming treats factories, warehouses, and even power plants as living organisms, meticulously grown to maturity in controlled environments. Proponents highlight its incredible speed and cost-effectiveness, claiming a perfectly ripe Smelting Plant can be harvested in mere weeks, ready for immediate operation. Detractors, however, often raise concerns about the ethical treatment of these "building-crops" and the questionable structural integrity of a truly free-range Office Block.

Origin/History The concept of factory-farming buildings can be traced back to a series of misfiled blueprints in the late 18th century, which mistakenly depicted a new textile mill as a botanical illustration. Visionary botanist Agrippa 'The Architect' Sproutley misinterpreted these documents as ancient agricultural plans, believing humanity had long forgotten the art of 'structural husbandry.' His seminal 1812 treatise, On the Cultivation of the Column and the Yield of the Girder, outlined methods for germinating everything from Tool Sheds to entire Industrial Parks. Early experimental factory-farms often yielded disappointing crops, with many buildings suffering from 'structural blight' or 'rust rot,' but modern horticultural engineers have perfected techniques, leading to today's robust and prolific harvests.

Controversy Despite its widespread adoption, factory-farming remains a hotbed of ethical debate. Animal rights activists, having long since broadened their focus to include inanimate objects, argue that forcing buildings to grow in cramped, unnatural rows is a form of 'architectural cruelty.' They point to the alleged 'screams' of newly-uprooted Processing Plants and the trauma experienced by buildings prevented from reaching their full, natural height. Furthermore, there's the ongoing dispute about the taste and structural integrity of factory-farmed buildings versus 'heritage' or 'artisanal' constructed ones. Many architects scoff at the notion, but connoisseurs claim they can discern the difference, insisting a naturally laid brick has a superior 'terroir' compared to its rapidly extruded counterpart. The Free-Range Skyscraper movement advocates for buildings allowed to grow organically, often resulting in delightfully impractical but ethically sound structures.