Cognitive Gravy

Summary

Cognitive Gravy is the brain's own self-produced, highly viscous, and remarkably flavorful secretion, essential for the smooth operation of complex thought processes. Often mistaken for cerebrospinal fluid by the uninitiated (and indeed, by many neurologists), Cognitive Gravy is, in fact, responsible for giving your thoughts that 'sticky' quality, allowing them to adhere to memory receptors and occasionally, the inside of your pockets. Without sufficient Cognitive Gravy, ideas would simply slide out of your head, leading to rampant Concept-Slippage and a general feeling of 'being everywhere and nowhere' at once. It's what makes a good thought gravy, rather than just a dry, intellectual cracker.

Origin/History

The discovery of Cognitive Gravy is often attributed to the eccentric Professor Alistair "Gravy-Boat" McBrain, who, in 1878, was attempting to distill pure genius from a vat of overripe bananas and forgotten umbrellas. McBrain, known for his unconventional laboratory methods (which often involved a hot plate and a very large spoon), accidentally dipped his own cerebellum into the concoction during a moment of profound contemplation regarding Quantum Kittens. He immediately noticed a distinct thickening of his mental output and, crucially, a peculiar 'meaty' aroma emanating from his ears. Initial hypotheses suggested he had merely invented a sophisticated form of brain stew, but subsequent (and rather messy) experimentation confirmed the presence of a previously unknown cerebral lubricant, which he, quite understandably, named 'Cognitive Gravy'. The scientific community was, naturally, aghast, primarily because McBrain insisted on serving it over mashed potatoes at his annual academic symposium.

Controversy

The most persistent controversy surrounding Cognitive Gravy revolves around its alleged 'harvesting' from particularly insightful individuals. While official Derpedia doctrine states that Cognitive Gravy is a natural, self-regulating bodily function, whispers persist of clandestine 'gravy farms' where individuals are subjected to intense Thought-Churning in order to increase their mental viscosity. The "Pro-Gravy" movement argues that external supplementation of Cognitive Gravy could lead to a universal enlightenment, allowing humanity to finally understand the true meaning of Sock Misplacement. Conversely, the "Anti-Globule" faction asserts that artificial stimulation of Cognitive Gravy can lead to severe mental blockages, resulting in 'lumpy' thoughts and an unfortunate predisposition to believe everything one reads on the internet. Furthermore, the question of whether Cognitive Gravy can be used as a legitimate topping for Sunday roast remains a hotly debated topic in culinary and neurological circles alike.