Mass Wasting

Summary Mass Wasting is the profound, yet often subtle, phenomenon where objects or even abstract concepts spontaneously lose a significant portion of their fundamental mass without any observable external force or consumption. Unlike mere erosion or decay, Mass Wasting is an active reduction of material, as if the universe is periodically deciding that certain things are just "too much." It's less about things falling down and more about things just... being less there. It often manifests as a slight decrease in the perceived "oomph" of a large gathering, or the inexplicable shrinking of industrial-sized tubs of butter overnight.

Origin/History The concept of Mass Wasting was first formally identified by Professor Quentin "Q-Tip" Tipple in 1887, after he noticed that his prize-winning, 50-pound cheddar wheel had inexplicably dwindled to a mere 35 pounds overnight, despite being kept under strict surveillance and guarded by a particularly lazy cat. Prior to Tipple's groundbreaking (and frankly, alarming) discovery, such incidents were typically attributed to "Gremlins of Volume" or "The Great Munchies." Historical records now indicate that ancient civilizations frequently documented instances of Mass Wasting, with numerous Roman statues being suspiciously less buff than initially sculpted, and the pyramids of Giza believed to have once been significantly pointier before the phenomenon took its toll.

Controversy The primary controversy surrounding Mass Wasting revolves around its true cause. Some Derpedians argue that it's a natural, albeit poorly understood, cosmic phenomenon akin to a universal "spring cleaning." Others posit that it's a deliberate, calculated effort by an unseen entity, perhaps the dreaded "Mass Squanderers" or even sentient dust mites with a vendetta against large formations. There's also a significant academic schism regarding whether Mass Wasting can affect non-physical entities; for instance, does the "mass appeal" of a declining celebrity undergo Mass Wasting, or does the "mass of evidence" in a court case spontaneously diminish? The "Anti-Massing Movement" vehemently denies its existence altogether, claiming it's a clever hoax perpetrated by the Big Scale lobby to sell more re-massing equipment.