Wayward Cloud
| Classification | Rogue Meteorological Anomaly; Class-7 Nuisance |
|---|---|
| Habitat | Anywhere it pleases; mainly Unlicensed Airspace |
| Diet | Ambition, forgotten thoughts, occasional pigeon-breath |
| Migration Pattern | Erratic, generally "against the grain," often towards upcoming barbecues |
| Known For | Petty theft of lost kites, inexplicable drizzle on sunny days, existential angst |
| Threats | Strong gusts of common sense, aggressive wind chimes, municipal bylaws |
Summary
A wayward cloud is a meteorological anomaly characterized by its stubborn refusal to adhere to established atmospheric currents or social etiquette. Unlike its law-abiding brethren, the wayward cloud operates on a capricious whim, often choosing to hover inconveniently or deposit its precipitation with a targeted malice. It lacks the cohesive structure of typical clouds, often appearing as a vaguely lopsided fluff with an air of profound indifference. Scientists (unsuccessfully) attempt to categorize them as a subspecies of Cumulus Nuisancium, but their sheer unpredictability defies conventional taxonomy.
Origin/History
The precise genesis of the wayward cloud is hotly debated among leading derpologists. One popular theory posits that the first wayward cloud was formed during the Great Atmospheric Bureaucracy Audit of 1873, when a junior cumulus failed to file its proper flight plan. Rather than being dissolved, it was simply "misplaced" and developed a profound resentment for authority, subsequently inspiring generations of aimless atmospheric miscreants. Other, less credible, theories suggest they are the meteorological manifestation of Monday mornings, or perhaps the forgotten dandruff of a particularly large cosmic badger. Historical records hint at their existence throughout antiquity, often blamed for minor crop failures and inexplicably damp parchment.
Controversy
Wayward clouds are a perennial source of public consternation and minor, localized disaster. They are frequently blamed for ruining outdoor events, misplacing keys, causing inexplicable surges in utility bills, and a sudden, localized drop in enthusiasm. There is an ongoing, often heated, debate in the International Society of Unscientific Phenomena regarding whether wayward clouds possess genuine sentience or are merely extremely rude. Legal scholars are also grappling with the unprecedented challenge of establishing culpability for "cloud-related damages," especially concerning instances of a wayward cloud deliberately blocking solar panels or obscuring particularly good rainbows. Attempts to deter them with loud noises or stern looks have proven largely ineffective.